Mommy, I Hurt

Thunderous explosions
Bursting hurt
Grief does complicate
Because your energy did not dissipate
And it is not ashes
It is compassion
You never lived intentional waste
You lived life fully, without haste
Your no was firm
Your hugs even tighter
And, after a lecture
Feeling awful,
I still felt lighter
Your laughter was easy, and
Always included your eyes
Your spirit forgiving
Gave so many tries
Given without Question
You were unique
Though not perfection
You made me complete
Your advice was solid
Your love stays pure
Your love surrounds
Your love abounds
Your love is real
No pretension
I didn’t have
All you wanted to give
You reminded me daily
“It is your life to live”
Selfish, perhaps
To want you back
I am merely human
You kept me on track
I cannot deny
Or stop this crying
I love you always
I live with the why
There is emptiness
Where you filled all
I remind myself
To get up
When I fall
But, daily I struggle
With No more You
I simulate cradle
I visualize your hand
I rock my body
Too devastated
Refuse to understand
I can call out
I tell myself
You are in my heart
If I shout
If I’m loud enough
Your arms will hear
I am part of you
Even apart
If I close my eyes
I only allow a second
Because I see your face
Far too dependent
On your help, your words, your love –
Your Grace
Eyes shut
You are too clear
It is too much
Because you are gone
And, I want you here
I love you Mommy
Every second, every day
I wish I knew how you felt
Moments before you slipped away
It may have helped
Get through these days
You were the glue
You kept us close
I hate that people
Say I’m just like you
You are the better
Of we two,
That, I always knew
I loved you so
But I’m not my Mommy
And I’m so lost
Can you come fetch me?

Image Courtesy:
Mother Kissing Child
By rmani005


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